Tuesday, 29 March 2011
There is a fat woman on my television at the moment who is so fat she can longer have sex with her husband or allow him to see her naked as she is so ashamed of herself. Sad you may think, poor woman, she's lacking self confidence and needs an understanding shoulder. What a stupid bitch I say as it cuts to her stuffing her face with fried chicken. Not only is she stuffing her own face, but also that of her 5 year old son who is busy telling her that the only thing better than a burger is... Wait for it... A DOUBLE BURGER! fuck me! She's so upset at her own pathetic waste of a life, she is forcing her son to be one and the same. The only way to solve this puzzling situation is obviously to go on tv and compare her to some gimp who only eats 4 times a week. He goes to bed at 3am and gets up at 3pm whereby he supplements his lack of appetite with cigarettes. So the woman now eats the man's diet and vice versa. They meet and stand in front of each other in their pants saying, "ooh, you're fat" and "ooh, you're skinny". I had to turn over at this point to 'How to buy a puppy' with Richard Briers narrating like I'm retarded. I think I'll go write my blog.